the four right chords can make me cry

Chronic Insecurity Rears its Ugly Head

Reading some emails from USP campers and OGLs. Ok, I know this is lame, but when they gave comments for everyone, i'm always listed last, and attached to some vague, hardly meaningful one-liner. eg. "Becky: Nice having you in my group!" Can't help but feel like I hardly made any impression, that I'm some faceless wallflower. Annonymity has its drawbacks.

And they all described their memories of camp as super-duper-duper fun. I'm like, really meh? I mean, camp was alright for me, but it wasnt exactly life-changing. It was fun and enjoyable, and I do wish it were longer, but i'm not exactly waxing lyrical about it.

Curses, blights and plagues be upon my shy nature and lack of social skills!

That's really what i'm afraid of I guess, that I will end up left behind as people make new friends, and float through my 4 years(hopefully 4) of university life alone, lonesome as a piece of driftwood. Driftwood? Haha, well, you get the idea.

Today was the first saturday of the year I didnt go for bay. Felt really sick so I went home and slept it off. Feeling much better now. But... heh. decided that i wont share that thought, it might rather shock you.

Oh yeah, do check out my guest appearance on Benben's blog!

posted by beckyboo @ 11:28 PM